I'm a convert to islam, when I first converted I didn't know of any muslim relatives, so in my first marriage the imaam acted as my wali.
I got divorced and I'm considering marriage but this time I have a conundrum. A few years ago my mother was introduced to a muslim man who it turns out shares a greatgrandfather with my father through my paternal grandfather.
On the other hand the son of my fathers first cousin converted to islam. His grandfather and my grandmother are siblings. His mother and my father are first cousins.
Do I also have to take into consideration which of the two is likely to stick to only islam and not bring in tradition like asking for gifts and money for the family which the first one would but the second wouldn't.
Is age a factor? The first is much older than the second.
Also does it matter that the second had a child out of wedlock while he was muslim, although it was the financial demands from her family that made them delay the nikah otherwise I would never have known about the sex outside of marriage.
Another thing, the second brother and I communicate easily, while with the first brother, there is a generational gap plus we communicate in what is both our second language and the first brother I'd like to consider for marriage doesn't speak it.
Finally, I live in the same city as the second brother, quite close actually, while the first brother lives approx 7 hours drive away in our home rural area.
Hope I'll get a response