Well, it *does*, you know!
We all know that sh*t happens, right? But it seems that depending on what you believe in this world, you may just know it a little differently. To elaborate, here’s a helpful chart:
Neutrality toward religion: Sh*t happens.
Confucianism: Confucius say, "Sh*t happens."
Taoism: Sh*t happens, but the sh*t that can be said to happen is not the true sh*t.
Buddhism: Sh*t happening is a natural part of the cycle of sh*t and rebirth.
Zen Buddhism: Sh*t happens, and sh*t does not happen.
Hinduism: This sh*t has happened before.
Idol worship: Let's bronze this sh*t!
Wicca: We create our own sh*t.
Islam: Sh*t happens, and Allah is not unaware of what you do.
Christianity: Verily, verily, I say unto you, sh*t happens.
Catholicism: If sh*t happens, you probably deserve it.
Protestantism: Sh*t happens, and you’d better believe it!
Judaism: Oh, why must this sh*t always happen to us?
Secular Humanism: Sh*t doesn’t just happen, it evolves.
Determinism: Hey, this sh*t’s bound to happen!
Capitalism: Hands off, that is MY sh*t!
Hedonism: There is nothing like a good sh*t happening!
Scientology: In case of sh*t happening, see "Dianetics", p.157.
Jehovah's Witnesses: (*Knock knock*!) (“Who’s there?”) (“Sh*t happens.")
Zoroastrianism: Sh*t happens only half the time.
Strong agnosticism: Sh*t happens. Maybe.
Weak agnosticism: What is this sh*t anyway?!
Atheism: I don’t believe this sh*t.
Atheism: Correction, we merely have a lack of belief in this sh*t.
Nihilism: No sh*t.
Narcissism: I am the sh*t!
Last edited by Yahya Sulaiman; 4th July 2011 at 22:03.